Why I would rather choose to be single? Or let’s just say why I am still single after a failed relationship?

Most of us nowadays have so many questions in our mind. Do I look ugly? Is there something wrong with me that turn them off? Do men/women higher their standards already? Or maybe GOD just wanted me to stay single forever? So many questions yet so difficult to answer or not even one can be answered.

THIS is the underbelly of singleness. The dark side. Where the rubber meets the road. Where the truth comes out and it’s not the slightest bit pretty, or inspirational, or even positive. I have so many thoughts about relationships. And while I have a pretty serious relationship a year ago, now I’m clearly single. And I’m fine with that.Not fine when people say they’re fine but deep inside they’re not. But TRULY, CERTAINLY FINE! In fact, it seems that my family, colleagues and friends is more concerned about me being single than I am. Now that I am in the quarter year of my life, it seems that the panic level is higher than ever. People around me are so worried about my love life, my happiness, finances and my eggs. (HAHAHAHA! and HA!) And I often feel like I’m in the twilight zone, looking around at everyone and asking myself “Ano nangyari?Bakit parang mas nagmamadali sila kesa sakin? Mauubusan ba ako?” but on the other side of it I also realized that there are still people who really care and love me and wishing and praying for my HAPPINESS! My FOREVER HAPPINESS (Feeling loved) yayyyyy! ^-^

But, HEY GUYS! Chill! I’m still young, if it’s GOD’s time for me to find THE ONE it will just happen… It will just come…I’m not closing my door for possibility that one day, there is someone who’s gonna change my whole perspective about love relationships…and reason why I wanted to stay single is that I just really like it. Yes! You read it right. There are really a lot of things I really loved about being unattached. I like my independence and I like staying up late at night, lounging diagonally across my bed eating my favorite crackers alone, drinking my ice cold milo and watching my favorite movies over and over again. (Love to think about that always <3) When you’re single your emotions are safely guarded and not vulnerable to the wrong person. When you are single you really have the time to get to know who you are and who you want to be and while waiting on love, you can still enjoy life fully and on your own terms. This is not everyone’s story but it’s mine. Satisfaction with my life isn’t based off on being paired off or not. Being single is “YOU time”. Yeah, I know this is very cliché to say but it is true. Discovering the true you is essential to make any other relationship in your life work. Coming out of a long relationship, especially one that wasn’t healthy, you usually start again with nothing. (Not being bitter but of course you really have reservation when it comes to entertaining another prospect for your love relationship).

 I want every single fiber of my being to be one of those SELF-ASSURED, CONFIDENT BOLD woman of GOD who knows exactly who SHE is in CHRIST and walks in the freedom of knowing how loved she is, how precious she is and how validated she is. I want to be that woman, but I’m not that woman yet. I’m still on a journey to become her. And that’s fine. TOTALLY, SUPER FINE!!!

Happiness can be found when we learn to embrace reality. Seeking love isn’t an easy quest, but it’s always best to take this journey on our own side. It’s important to fight the patterns inside us that hold us back from getting what we really want. We can’t shield ourselves from the world or keep ourselves from getting hurt. We all carry flaws, and these vulnerabilities are especially apparent when getting close to one another. Thus, achieving intimacy is a brave battle, but it is one well-worth fighting for, each and every day, both within ourselves and ultimately within our relationships. The list goes on, but our singleness doesn’t have to be the dark ages of our existence. In fact, it can be a GIFT and a BLESSING. You just need to know how to use it. But for now, I am single because I chose to be single and that’s what today looks like, so… that’s what I’m goin’ with. 😉

Be Free.